The Question from Tilly

Geoff felt his heart tighten and cringe at the expression on his daughter’s face. Tilly’s eyes were narrowed and hard, her mouth barely opening as she flung words at him.

“How can you keep working in an industry that is contributing to climate change? I’ve been telling you for months, giving you all the articles I’m reading that give the evidence, the science. Mr. Peters is teaching us about the impacts on the environment and the impacts on our future if things don’t change. And what are you doing?”

“Tilly, my job pays for our lifestyle, your lifestyle, education in the school that pays Mr. Peters’ wage. It’s going to pay for your degree in environmental science you say you want.” An image of his daughter at four years old with a beautiful smile, reaching up to hug him, and telling him he was the best daddy was so in contrast with the young woman in front him. “It’s paying for this house, everything. I’ve tried to take on what you are talking about. We’ve put solar panels on the roof, we’ve ordered a hybrid car. Things will change, Tilly.”

“Not fast enough, and you’re part of it!” Tilly whirled and left the house slamming the door behind her. It felt like the air around him was shaking with Tilly’s anger, while his body shook with the disappointment Tilly felt in him. He’d taken the job years ago to support his family, to give her everything she’d ever want. That little girl he’d pushed on a swing, taught how to play softball, helped with her maths, he’d always felt so close to her and now incredibly distant. He stood at the window hoping to see her coming back but her car was already gone from the driveway.

His wife, Deb, stood beside him, her head on his shoulder and her arms wrapped around him.

“Should I find another job? Should I do what she wants? I don’t know how we get a balance with what we have and what Tilly wants.”

“You’re still the best dad.”

Tears formed. “Am I?”