
Lunch at Acquerello
The waiter brings menus. I’m not interested in food; I just like watching you. A lock of hair escapes its silver clasp. You dreamily twirl it around one finger. You get ten points for sheer elegance.
“You haven’t changed a bit, Laura,” I tell you. Terrible opening. I deduct five points from my score for lack of originality. Starting off in the hole. “Except for the pierced ears.” I redeem myself, bringing my points back to zero.
You look startled. Your left hand inadvertently touches an opal earring.
“Your birthstone,” I state as if I actually knew. You nod, impressed. You always had a penchant for zodiac signs, and a fondness for opals. I finally put two and two together. Lucky guess, perhaps. I prefer to think of it as inspired. I proudly bump my count up to ten.
“What a creative menu,” I observe. “Asparagus, avocado and lime soup.” Sounds like you. “Still a vegetarian?” You smile your acknowledgement. More points for me. The count is getting high; I need to record it. I surreptitiously pull up the calculator on my phone and enter scores. You frown and stare suspiciously.
“Just checking on Mom. She’s not been well lately.” You always hated my score-keeping, but soften after the lie about my mother. Three points for me.
You seem pleased with your triple-green soup. I’m loving my braised salmon. “Waiter, bring us some flowers,” I call out on a whim. He brings yellow roses. You shake your head. “Take them away,” I amend. Minus three. Forget roses.
“How’s Adam?” Your gesture says he’s history. Excellent. Adam’s out, I’ll soon be back in.
After the pear sorbet, I signal the waiter. “Check, please. And reserve us this same table for Monday.”
“No thanks!” Self-possessed, sweet, always the perfect lady. “You and your silly scoring system. You also haven’t changed a bit. We’re divorced, Jim, remember?” You sail out, but I’m not worried. You get ten points for poise.
“On Monday, red dahlias for our table,” I tell the waiter. Unusual. Out of season. Twenty points.
You’ll come. I’m sure of it.
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To Leave Comments - Please SignIn with GoogleJim is a bit strange, isn’t he, Fuji? I do like the food they are eating! And I’d love to have a bouquet of red dahlias in the winter. The touch of holly berries in the picture is especially nice.
Yes, Jim is definitely a strange man! I’m glad you liked the picture, Juma, and thanks for reading and commenting.
Jim is funny with his scoring system. Honestly, if I were Laura, I would be disappointed if I had that kind of date. But to have a bouquet of red dahlias is 100 points for me. This story is so entertaining, Fuji. Well done.
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To Leave Comments - Please SignIn with GoogleI’m glad you found the story entertaining, Lotchie. Jim is definitely not our ideal date, is he? But the flowers would be lovely, especially in the winter! But you don’t have winters in the Philippines, do you? I mean cold, barren, colorless winters.
I really enjoyed Jim, Fuji. His point system is quite entertaining! It makes one wonder if this is why he is divorced because it may explain a thing or two. ?
Yes, Melissa, I totally think Jim’s strange habits of scoring every action led Laura to leave him. By the way, Jim is based on a real person I knew a while back. He proposed to his wife by writing a programming flow chart, asking her to fill in the blanks with 1’s or 0’s for yes and no. He once called me all excited that he had “created a sunrise” on the… Read more »
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To Leave Comments - Please SignIn with GoogleHow interesting, Fuji. I could definitely see this as off putting. I guess some people would view this behaviour as quirky or endearing but my brain isn’t quite wired that way! I wouldn’t know how to take it, and would be quite confused. Words work best I think! I like how this was based on your friend. Jim sort of seems autistic or even “on the spectrum”. My daughter is, and she… Read more »
Oh no. I just read the comments below. I once created a portrait of my granddaughter on the computer using only 1s and 0s. Admittedly, it was after a photoshop course. So,10 points for your excellent story.
Susan, what an utterly delightful comment! Did you really “paint” your granddaughter pixel by pixel? How fascinating, and what an accomplishment. I have a little more respect for my friend and his sunrise after reading your comment. Thanks for the 10 points! ?
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To Leave Comments - Please SignIn with GoogleIt seems obvious to me that Laura divorced Jim because of his point-scoring and who can blame her! But poor Jim can’t seem to help himself. It’s like he’s having a silent argument with her, always seeking to come out on top. Really cleverly written Fuji and such an interesting read.
Thanks so much for reading and commenting, Linda. Notice that Jim always gave Laura points, never subtracted any for her. He actually adores her. He’s much more critical of himself, measuring his every action against stringent standards. Poor guy. I predict Laura will in fact show up on Monday. For one thing, the food at the Acquerello is unsurpassed. Here’s a link to their current “sampling” menu: https://www.acquerellosf.com/menus No one but Jim… Read more »
Oh, how did I miss that Fuji? Yes, he gives her 10 points for poise, dismissing her words completely and deducting zero points! I just checked the menu out, the selection is almost as mind-blowing as the prices! I’d love to visit San Francisco and, if I ever win the lottery, enjoy lunch at Acquerello. Perhaps you can join me. ?
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To Leave Comments - Please SignIn with GoogleYou’re on! I look forward to you winning the lottery and inviting me to lunch in San Francisco! I’ve never been there either, but I do love avocado and asparagus soup! Can you believe that menu?
8 points to Jim for his optimism and attempts to win back his ex-wife! And 5 points for inviting her to a fancy, expensive restaurant like Acquerello, although he’s not interested in food. But many, many more points to you, Fuji, for this amazing story of the couple’s meeting and for revealing his thoughts to us! I love it! It’s one of your best stories! And now, I’ll have to go back… Read more »
Christer, your comment made me smile! I’m a little amazed that you thought this was one of my best stories. The more I read it, the more I like it myself! Funny how that works sometime. I was inspired by a short movie entitled “Song of Lunch”. The entire movie was a poem with the same title. The two main characters were Alan Rickman and Emma Thompson. Rickman narrated the poem, and… Read more »
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To Leave Comments - Please SignIn with GoogleThank you for revealing the inspiration of your story, Fuji. I looked it up, and found “Song of Lunch” as you describe it on YouTube. It’s a brilliant piece and I would like to recommend it to other members of our family. It’s accessible at https://youtu.be/h7nnGbbefuo Thanks also for the 50 points! Editor’s note: We tried the link Christer listed and it’s blocked in the USA, for copyright reasons. We found the… Read more »
I guess I’m lucky to be in Colombia in this case. I even found it at a second YouTube link: https://youtu.be/677k4Ze8ko8
Probably, this one is also blocked for the USA, but it could be worth trying for those who don’t have Prime Video.