Contest - Scary - Halloween Fun!
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- November 17, 2020
- 16 Comments
- Haiku
- Andrew Carter
Haiku
Mulberry Kimono
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Contest – CLOSED – Scary
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Andrew, this is a truly lovely haiku. It reminds me of what Basho said about “becoming the thing” you are writing about. The reader seems to be transported to a different world, where s/he can contemplate the dressmaker, the mulberry leaf and the silkworm – and therefore the Universe. Thank you for a wonderful start to my day.
Thanks Fuji, I’m glad the silkworm’s dress caught your eye. I’m only around until December, so I’m taking the liberty to post this series of haiku below:
Heart-shaped Sky
I feel low until
I spy a blue heart of sky
amid calico
What is this message –
a milk-white cloud then flees
as leaves fall from trees
A love heart returns
this time a cloud above
makes me wonder why
Whether cloudy or
clear, love is here – remember
God’s sign above
Andrew, thank you so much for this haiku series. These verses contain a beautiful message. We will all miss you! Don’t be a stranger – hope you will return to Voice.club when you can.
I think this is one of the best haiku on this site, Andrew. I can’t get it out of my mind. What was your source of inspiration?
Thanks, Juma. I remembered collecting mulberry leaves from a churchyard tree, nearly fifty years ago; to feed my silkworms. I pictured a silkworm spinning its cocoon, as a kind of dress. It combines a Japanese iconic emblem (kimono) with its original (silk), maker. There should be a hyphen after the word ‘kimono’ but I may have forgotten it 🙂 My own tree started fruiting recently – they’re great with cereals 🙂
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The background you described is just as fascinating as the haiku itself! You raise silkworms? In Australia? And now you’re eating mulberries from your own trees? What a wonderful garden you must have.
Silkworms were ‘in’ in 72′ but now it’s garden worm farms for my exotic trees here in Newcastle, NSW. They are 2yrs old (mulberry is 5 metres), and they’re the children I never had. Your name had me intrigued so I researched, Juma, to find an American author, Joy Anderson, wrote “Juma and the Jinn (Jeannie)”, in 1986 (about a boy who had misadventures before discovering a new attitude to study). “Jumanji” was loosely based on the same, and I can relate, very much to the boy. Are you the Jeannie, I wonder? I’m still familiarizing with this site. Have you posted poetry? You are no doubt a poet. And children’s book author?
Hi Andrew – Happy New Year! You mentioned above “There should be a hyphen after the word ‘kimono’ but I may have forgotten it”. Actually, I may have missed the hyphen during my scribe recording. I agree with Juma, Mulberry Kimono is really such a great Haiku, it deserves to be perfected!
I would like to practice writing this out more, and when time allows, try to record a new version. Are there any other minor changes to correct on your above Haiku?
Best wishes to you and yours, and good luck in the new year 🙂
文龙
Happy New Year, Culture Dragon. Poets can be very fussy, and forgetful. I lost my sunnies (shades), the other day, and chucked a tantrum – but the tantrum remained.
Whenever’s convenient, for corrections.
From what I’ve learned, the hyphen is important in some haiku because it precedes the cutting word, and ‘turn’ of the poem.
After some kind comments, I’m inspired to write one about my guava tree, tonight.
Your recording, timing, and handwriting of our poems is much appreciated. Thanks again for your work and let me know if I can help out with anything.
Hello Andrew, listening to the words in your Haiku, expresses how we connect to each other. I hear this is in the comment written below, and see in my mind, little bridges that form from image to the other.
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Hi Eric, that’s a wonderful way of seeing things, and timely. After getting back into gardening, I have decided to have another go at writing haiku, only this time I’ll try learning stringing them in sets of three. I’ve been studying notes from an Australian poet, Quendryth Young. She writes haiku without uppercase letters so, I simply followed like a sheep. It kind of makes sense though, to keep them simple.
On a separate note, I’m having trouble learning to communicate on this site (in the above comment to Culture Dragon), question marks appeared, which I didn’t intend, so I’m a bit scared to post not knowing what’s going to be printed. I’m guessing they might have been emojis.
it is nice to meet you Andrew, let your writing and poetry do the communicating for you, because that is who you are, they are you,. In life, simplicity works the miracles. You only have to read the replies you receive to know that you have made the connection. This site is like a comfy chair, just sit back and enjoy.
Your wisdom is no doubt born from experience, Eric. Writing and poetry ‘is’ who we are, and I have been pondering how simplicity does indeed work miracles. Thanks for your guidance, it will stay with me. And yes, so will the comfy chair.
Hi Andrew and
Eric Radcliffe – we noticed Andrew’s comment about unwanted question marks sometimes appearing instead of emojis. We cleaned up the comment you mentioned, and we are looking into why emojis appear differently on different browsers. Please do not hesitate to post and we will make sure your comments always look good.
Hey Voice-Team, to help diagnose the ’emojis becoming question marks’ enigma; I often use PC, however at times, I use iPad, or iPhone so, that might be why the glitches occur. It could be a bit disenchanting for the person being replied to because they see a question mark instead of a friendly smile, for instance. Thanks for picking up on this so quickly after it was mentioned.
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Voice-Team, I see you got emojis happening now ?