How I love waking up in the dark— the strange sense of power it gives me to see everyone curled up sleeping tight! The sense of superiority— I did manage to leave the comfort of the blanket. And the competition— I started early, and I am much ahead, yayy!

The beauty of dawn filtered in, announcing the brand new start of the day.

I filled up my flask with hot Chai, laced up my shoes, and took the first step outside the door. The refreshing air filled up my nostrils and my lungs. How much I would love to have company, to talk to someone while walking. As I reached the entrance of the park, I saw the little girl with a pile of today’s newspaper like everyday, sitting on the bench, curled up in a shawl. She handed me the newspaper and I gave her money.

There was something different today though.

I didn’t walk away from her with the newspaper in my hand like other days; rather I decided to have a talk with her.

“Today you are very early!” I said. She was shivering in cold, and with dried up tears on her cheeks, she just nodded.

“I came earlier than other days, so I could sell more. Last night my mother passed away, and I need money to arrange her funeral.” I sat there speechless. I couldn’t decide if I should comfort her first or offer help.

Today’s dawn, which brought me the sense of peace and tranquility, brought her the agony of the loss of her mother— it wiped off the word ‘mother’ from her life’s dictionary.

I gave her my tea flask to drink tea so her body could warm up a little and accompanied her to her mother’s funeral. I couldn’t leave that girl alone. My weeping heart needed company and she needed a home.

Since then, I have been taking a walk every morning alongside her at the dawn of every day.

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Sandra James
Sandra James (@sandra-james)
7 months ago

A beautiful story and I especially loved ‘My weeping heart needed company and she needed a home.’ Well done!

Eric Radcliffe
Eric Radcliffe (@eric-radcliffe)
7 months ago

Hello Musing Mind, what a sad but enlightening story of two different worlds. Yes Compassion becomes a Dawn when we place our self in different shoes. You made this point beautifully. This is a lovely write – Thank You. Eric.

Alan Kemister
Alan Kemister (@alan-kemister)
7 months ago

Interesting story about the different perspectives of the two central characters. I liked the way the main character went from optimism to despair to hope. Well done.

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Genya Johnson
Genya Johnson (@genya-johnson)
7 months ago

Such a sad story entwined with hope, care and love. I was moved by your story knowing there is still so much kindness out there.

bob mynors
bob mynors (@bob-mynors)
7 months ago

Looking beyond the people we see into the people they are can be a salutary, but also an unsettling experience. This is one story that left me wanting more. Thank you.

Katy Bizi
Katy Bizi (@katy-bizi)
7 months ago

What a bittersweet story! It fits perfectly with the theme of “Dawn”.

Carrie OLeary
Carrie OLeary (@carrie-oleary)
7 months ago

This was such a lovely story. I loved how you managed to use the positivity of your protagonist into helping someone in so much need. The empathy shone through. If you decide to do anything else with the story, at a later date, you could perhaps consider changing the wording a little towards the end. You very quickly went from the little girl needing to make extra money to arrange the funeral, to your protagonist giving the child her tea and accompanying her to the funeral. It just didn’t quite feel like it fitted. I loved the compassion of your character; like Bob, your story left me wanting more ?

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Carrie OLeary
Carrie OLeary (@carrie-oleary)
7 months ago
Reply to  musing mind

That’s the problem I often have. It’s one that definitely deserves extending and exploring more.

Christer Norrlof
Christer Norrlof (@christer-norrlof)
7 months ago

I agree with what both you and Carrie are saying, musing mind. It’s a lovely story, with the main character going from being proud of herself, superior, and self-sufficient, to being compassionate and helping. But things turn around a bit too abruptly at the end. The dilema is the word limit, which at the same time is the big challenge. I started out with 1,500 words in my own story and then chiseled away a lot of material that I really would have liked to stay.

Andrew Carter
Andrew Carter (@andrew-carter)
7 months ago

A heartwarming story, Musing Mind. Your writing flows so gently and the turns are so fluent. The contrast of a loving action is highlighted poignantly about something so painful. A delightful ending.

Katy Bizi
Katy Bizi (@katy-bizi)
7 months ago

I agree with Christer and Carrie that I would have preferred to have seen more of the ending scene. However, let’s not forget that there is a crucial limit of 350 words. So, since we’re talking about a short story which means that some details are left out and the reader is in charge of creating them in their own way, I think that musing mind has done an excellent job.

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kushal singh
kushal singh (@kushal-singh)
7 months ago

Interesting topic and a beautiful story.

Juma
Juma (@juma)
7 months ago

This is a beautiful story, musing mind, and one that gives us all hope. Thank you for your talent and sensitivity and congratulations on a well-deserved win!

Katy Bizi
Katy Bizi (@katy-bizi)
7 months ago

Thank you again, musing mind, for gifting us with such a bittersweet and beautiful story! Congratulations!

Lotchie Carmelo
Lotchie Carmelo (@lotchie-carmelo)
3 months ago

Congratulations on your win, Musing mind. This is a very beautiful story. Hope to read more from you.

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