Driving to the Mountain

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Bait
It takes a real talent to tell a story in so few words. What was…
Endure and Sing
Inspirational piece. Am glad you picked the rat to be the protagonist in your story,…
Endure and Sing
Such a sweet tale - and with a good moral to the story. I thought…
Endure and Sing
Wow! This is a good story! Really good to read to little kids, the moral…
Endure and Sing
Hi Katy, it really does add an extra dimension to hear your story read aloud…
Endure and Sing
In my neighboring country Denmark, we have the classical storyteller Hans-Christian Andersen. Your sweet story…
Endure and Sing
A really nice one with a wonderful story line. I can see why this was…
Endure and Sing
A beautiful story! I was reminded of seeing Paul Potts and Susan Boyle on Britain's…
Endure and Sing
Your story inspired me to keep going no matter how discouraging it gets. At times…
Endure and Sing
Thank you so much for the feedback! I pray that the young readers will be…
Endure and Sing
Thank you for taking the time to comment and convey your thoughts on the story.…
Endure and Sing
Hi Katy, don't we all feel like the rat in your story at times! We…
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I must admit it was the picture of the church, with its grave yard, under…
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A very powerful story, Daniel. Your writing makes it easy to feel the reality of…
Between Belonging and Dying
Oh my gosh, Daniel. Your story really defines the word superb. You make me experience…
Between Belonging and Dying
A horrendous situation, more so because so many people find themselves going through it. A…
Between Belonging and Dying
What an extremely powerful story Daniel, really well written and with an ending that had…
Between Belonging and Dying
Daniel, this story is one of the best flash fiction stories I've ever read. You…
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I didn’t see that ending coming, Fuji! Very intriguing 🙂
I’m intrigued that the process of writing down the words can suddenly turn your story in directions you hadn’t thought of! I had this story all planned in my mind, but while typing it, the story itself took a different turn, unbeknownst to me! Who is the author here? Does anyone else experience that?
What an interesting read and a great twist at the end.
Thanks Carrie. This story was great fun to write. It seemed to write itself at the end.
The end was not predictable at all. This was a beautiful story. Picking mountain as the goal to reach was a very good idea.
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Thank you, musing mind. I liked the idea of driving toward a very elusive mountain. It led to a surprise ending that I hadn’t anticipated!
I think we are all becoming invisible, til the only reality is behind the computer screen, on Zoom. My area goes into lockdown again tonight – could do with a mountain to bang my head against.
Beautiful story. I love the twist at the end. Keep on going!
As a comment to your answer to Sandra, I would like to say that it happens to me too that a story surprises me by taking its own turns; by going where I didn’t plan for it to go. It’s fascinating when it happens because I think that’s where the subconscious part of our minds can help us to make the story more interesting and intriguing, both to its writer and to its readers.
There’s a parallel to that thought in your story, Fuji. The “I” thinks she knows it all; that she has things under control. Only when she realizes and accepts that she is mistaken, is she ready to ask for help.
Your story is a good metaphor for opening up the mind to new and foreign ideas in the writing process. The hidden greatness in our stories; what we can’t see in them (because it’s hidden in our cloudy, preconceived mind), becomes clear to us only when we accept that the ego has to go away (become invisible). Only then are we ready to receive the help that is being offered.
Am I right in thinking this story begins with the word ‘blasted’? It’s this end of her listening to the Ego? (second and third opinion) I think Christer hit the nail on the head, when he said that it’s only when we subconsciously lose our self in a story, that our intuition takes over. Well, Fuji another great story from you – well written.
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Very interesting story but I am astonished when I came to read the ending part of the story. What an excellent twist, Fuji. You surprised me a lot.