A story about cherry blossoms? Too pink. Too girly. No way.

I’m no slouch when it comes to writing. In fact, I’ll be a great author someday!  But first I have to make it through little league without being laughed off the field. The guys so far have been proud of my stories, trading them like baseball cards. But pink flowers won’t cut it with them. Still, it’s a homework assignment, so I have to do something. I plop down at the computer and begin writing.

“Big Mike McCorkle stands on the pitcher’s mound, eying the batter through evil-looking slits. His red and black uniform is covered with dirt, where he slid into home the top of the fourth. He spits on the ball; the batter cries “yuck”. That prissy thing doesn’t have a clue, he thinks. Look at her in that silly pink uniform. The Battling Bulldogs will slaughter those ridiculous Cherry Blossoms.”

After that auspicious beginning, my story carries the Dogs to a massive win, with the Blossoms all boo-hooing and acting helpless. The guys will love this story! Next day I hand it in, feeling smug. The following week, Ms Whitaker singles me out. “Charles, please read your story aloud to the class. Girls, listen closely.” She sounds ominous, like thunder. I look around the room. This writing class is mostly girls, all glaring at me. Matilda’s slapping a metal ruler against her hand.  Abby and Allie are obviously itching for a fight. Sandra’s muttering to herself. Everywhere I look, a hostile feminine face. Hmm. Change of plans. I start pretending to read, making it up as I go.

“Mike eyes the batter warily.  She’s a home run Queen. In fact all the Cherry Blossoms have made history. We’ll have a hard time beating this bunch, he thinks with respect, and with more than a little fear.”

When I finish my story, the room is warm with approval. “Two cardinal rules for writers, Chuck.” Now Ms. Whitaker is all smiles.  “Know your audience and don’t be afraid to rewrite!”

Look guys, you had to be there!

0 0 votes
Post Rating
Comments without a personalized avatar will not be published.
21 Comments
Oldest
Newest Most Voted
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Carrie OLeary
Carrie OLeary(@carrie-oleary)
1 year ago

Fun story Fuji, made me smile. We girls need the power sometimes ?

Marianna Pieterse
Marianna Pieterse(@marianna-pieterse)
1 year ago

Fuji, this is brilliant! I love it. It made me chuckle. Good thing that Charles had a ‘change of heart’, otherwise he might have been in big trouble! I enjoyed reading this.

Comments without a personalized avatar will not be published.
Linda Rock
Linda Rock(@linda-rock)
1 year ago

Good move Charles and wise words from Ms. Whitaker! Aside from her change of tone towards him at the end, I loved how she then referred to him, more endearingly, as Chuck rather than Charles at the start! Great story Fuji.

Comments without a personalized avatar will not be published.
Santina Forlenza
Santina Forlenza(@santina-forlenza)
1 year ago

?Very nice, Fuji. And thanks for sharing the 2 cardinal rules for writers.

Susan Dawson
Susan Dawson(@susan-dawson)
1 year ago

Never a truer word, Fuji. I did read back through to check if the teacher knew, and of course she did. I arrived at my Zoom writing class half way through this week, saw the picture prompt they were writing about and pulled out ‘one I did earlier’ to read out. Of course Voice.Club makes that sort of behaviour easy as one has dozens on tap!

Comments without a personalized avatar will not be published.
Susan Giles
Susan Giles(@susan-giles)
1 year ago

This kind of understanding teacher makes life – and the school day – better for everyone. Thank you for your story.

Comments without a personalized avatar will not be published.
Dipayan Chakrabarti
Dipayan Chakrabarti(@dipayan-chakrabarti)
1 year ago

I have read your story and was entertained and amused.

Eric Radcliffe
Eric Radcliffe(@eric-radcliffe)
1 year ago

Hello Fuji, I could see you rattling your brains for a day or longer, thinking I need to see this story line through different eyes! Well you did just that, I could even hear you laughing to yourself as you lived the part writing it. By the way who wouldn’t change their story, with Matilda slapping a metal ruler against her hand. Again, a great write Fuji, well done – go to the top of the class on this one.

Comments without a personalized avatar will not be published.
Sandra James
Sandra James(@sandra-james)
1 year ago

A wonderful twist and a very quick-thinking protagonist! He will go far! I had a good laugh and I do wish I’d been there 🙂

Comments without a personalized avatar will not be published.
Christer Norrlof
Christer Norrlof(@christer-norrlof)
1 year ago

The words “adjustment” and “flexibility” comes to mind as I read this entertaining and fun story, Fuji. Charles/Chuck, his teacher and, I think Fuji too, took interesting turns as the story progressed. As always, your choice of words, your care for details and your good humor are all there to be enjoyed by your readers. Great job!

Lotchie Carmelo
Lotchie Carmelo(@lotchie-carmelo)
1 year ago

I’m really pleased, Fuji. Thanks for sharing two cardinal rules for writers. This has been a big help for me as a beginner.

Comments without a personalized avatar will not be published.
Become a PatronHelp support our family-friendly mission

Recent Comments

21
0
Selected Authors may submit comments (5 Credits)x
()
x
Scroll to Top

Sharing a Post

Why do my friends need to SignIn to read the post I shared?

Actually, this is a voting security feature. During public voting, only club members can read posts submitted for that contest. Since anyone reading the story is able to vote (click the Like button), we reserve these capabilities to members who SignIn. Before we implemented this security feature, people were voting multiple times and making the public voting process unfair and out of balance. To fix this, our staff finally decided to allow only members who SignIn to read the stories. Membership is free and easy, and ensures our club is safe, secure, and family-friendly!