Lily

Lily, the prettiest girl in this whole world, daughter of mine. Papa will go on a trip for a while, you will be alone at home. I guess you will be mad because I don’t say anything, therefore I write this letter.

The moment that I first saw you, with your tiny hands and bright eyes, it erased all my pain from the loss of your mom. I felt something I’ve never felt before, my heart pumping fast. There was some connection between us started at that moment.

Seeing you grow up was something magical too.  Your hair started to get longer, darker, and like silk. You have your mom’s lips, perfectly like a heart shape, soft and tender just as it looks. 

Remember on your 8th birthday, you in the pink dress, with a crown – it will always be my favorite moment of yours.

But then when you grew older, it got worse for me, and I know this is not your fault, I am just too sensitive.

The first time you talked back at me, you started yelling and crying continuously at me. You seemed so out of control, and it was because of a boy. I was furious and sorry for the way I reacted.

But at least I did try to fix things after. I boiled eggs to help with your cheeks, I brought you hot chocolate, stayed with you the whole time while you were sleeping.

So why did you not give me another chance ??

You pushed me away, you stopped talking to me. 

And then the worst things came – you got pregnant with the boy who hurt you. I was devastated and irate. I thought there is no secret in my house. You left me no choice, you let me down, and broke my heart. 

Now you’re laying on the ground so quiet, but at least you are going to stay here with me forever. I feel bad for the thing I did but I am not sorry for that. You’re daddy’s girl, remember? So don’t miss me much, Papa will come home soon.