I can feel the cold from the window, but still I refrain from closing the curtains. To block out the raindrop trails and to mute the storm would be to tempt fate.

I sit wrapped in a blanket staring out of the window, waiting for his headlights to turn into our driveway. The news continues in the background. An accident on the A4.

Relief engulfs me. I focus on the yellow glow the headlights create. My brain refuses to register the blue flashing lights.

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    Lotchie Carmelo
    Lotchie Carmelo(@lotchie-carmelo)
    2 years ago

    Hello, Mary. Is this a true story of your life? Is one of your family members involved in a road accident at A4?

    Lotchie Carmelo
    Lotchie Carmelo(@lotchie-carmelo)
    Reply to  Mary Wallace
    2 years ago

    I see, Mary. No. you do not have to say sorry; it is still nice and a little confusing. But I like how you opened up your story: “I can feel the cold from the window.” I feel like I am in the story too. Good job.

    Fuji
    Fuji(@fuji)
    2 years ago

    A very well-written story, Mary, which reflects the anxiety many of us feel when a loved one is late arriving as expected. I was bowled over by the ending.

    Juma
    Juma(@juma)
    2 years ago

    I have lived this scene so many times, even down to the idea of not wanting to tempt fate. I think all mothers and fathers could identify with this story, even though you don’t say whether your protagonist is waiting for a son, a husband, or perhaps even a brother. Thank heavens my anxious waits have always had happy endings. Excellent writing, Mary.

    Christer Norrlof
    Christer Norrlof(@christer-norrlof)
    2 years ago

    I like the way you avoid going into details about what happened and that the waiting person all the time is unaware of what’s going on, although the radio gives a hint. Also that she refused to take in the flashing, blue light outside the window. This is what happens when amnesia strikes and, in a way, it’s interesting that the brain does that.

    Marianna Pieterse
    Marianna Pieterse(@marianna-pieterse)
    2 years ago

    Mary this is such a sad story I think many people can relate to the anxious feeling of waiting for someone who is running late. Really well told.

    Carrie OLeary
    Carrie OLeary(@carrie-oleary)
    2 years ago

    You’ve expressed the anxiety that anyone with a loved one who is running late feels really well. A heart rending ending; that your protagonist blocked out what was really happening, their sense of relief when they see the glow of headlights, is utterly believable. Well done.

    Linda Rock
    Linda Rock(@linda-rock)
    2 years ago

    How often does our brain refuse to accept what is right in front of us? It’s a form of self-protection, for to accept what we see or know would mean losing all hope. You expressed this and so much more in so few words Mary. Really well written.

    Thompson Emate
    Thompson Emate(@thompson-emate)
    2 years ago

    Waiting for a loved one who is due to have arrived and hasn’t could stir so much anxiety. Worst still is if the person can’t be reached on phone. Well crafted story.

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