They say no news is good news. But when you work at a news station, that’s not exactly true. No news means you’re fired, and good news is whatever brings in ratings. And what brings in ratings is bad news because people only ever seem to watch the news when they’re scared or angry. So, if you want to make everyone happy you have to make everyone else upset. And so good news becomes bad news and bad news becomes good news. You could drive yourself crazy thinking about it too much. So, I try not to. I like to leave morality out of it. If it’s going to become so scrambled, what difference does it make? And so, I just call it the news. It’s neither good nor bad, it just is what it is. So, I type the news into the teleprompter. The anchor reads it to the world, and they make of it what they will.
Meanwhile, the world will keep on spinning regardless of the news. I’ll clock out and walk home. I’ll feed my cat and she’ll nuzzle against my ankle. Then my wife and I will eat popcorn and watch a movie we’ve seen a hundred times before. I don’t know if you can call that news, but -to me- it doesn’t get much better than that.