A Sunshine for Tristan
There were times when flowers bloomed bright and the light showers filled us with satiety. We walked along the alleys as they rained pleasantly upon us, felt the droplets trickle gracefully along our glistening skins and seep into the core of our souls. We were awash with the bliss we so garnered to the heart and the song that the birds sang in time with the raindrops. We held our arms together in utmost delight and hoped the world was an endless sea of joy.
They were days of youth and vigour. Our veins were full of young blood. The life ahead of us was long and adventurous.
So we set forth to trek the journey of life together, having bound to our breast a hope of a future bright. We carried some baggage with us, added little by little along the way, and slowly, slowly, it began to dawn upon us that the journey would not be as easy as we had determined. But we did have our blessed moments — our highs, our sunshines.
Yet when we started stumbling down, when the sunshine was replaced with a black cloud, we went so sharply off a cliff, and I lost her. She was swallowed by pestilence, lost to the world. Taken away from me, from us, to the world of no return.
On that day when we said our last goodbyes, as I stood at the edge of the tomb, tears stung my eyes. It was a losing battle trying to hold them back. There was a bitter lump in my throat. Our son Tristan was at my side, holding tight to my hand. We looked sadly at her sleeping in the casket, her face stilled in perfect peace, her eyes shut forever.
It was a sullen day of farewell as I took Tristan into my arms and turned away to figure out the rest of the journey. To think how it would be for Tristan now that we had lost she who had once held the light for us — she whose smile had lit our path all along.
Comments without a personalized avatar will not be published.
To Leave Comments - Please SignIn with GoogleThis was a very moving story of the journey of life – from youthful love, dreams and ambition to an extremely sad untimely ending. One feels the emotion building throughout the piece, as well as the tremendous power of both love and loss. Well done.
Thank you Preston. The sad reality of life is that there are lots of untimely ends. So many journeys end at a time when we would rather see where they lead.
Daniel, you wrote with emotion, drama and intense feeling. Your “A Sunshine for Tristan” was poetic and hooked the reader through showing rather than telling.
Well done, for this coming of age/love story which actually reminded me of Erich Segal’s “Love Story.”
Comments without a personalized avatar will not be published.
To Leave Comments - Please SignIn with GoogleThank you Margarida. I personally have one foot in poetry and the other in prose, so every so often I find myself treading both worlds at the same time. I have spent some months without writing at all, and as such it is encouraging to receive some positive feedback.
This story pulled at my heartstrings with the emotions that it elicited. The way you used such vivid imagery to describe the different scenes adequately portrayed the concepts of hope and then eventually loss, making it easy to connect with the story. It was positively gripping and very heartfelt. Thanks for this great story, Daniel 🙂
A beautiful story, Daniel. Your use of the name Tristan gives it an almost mythical feeling, combined with your lovely, poetic writing. Excellent work.
Comments without a personalized avatar will not be published.
To Leave Comments - Please SignIn with GoogleIt’s a melancholic and poetic description of the loss of a loved one, Daniel. It’s easy to feel the quiet despair of your protagonist and feel for him as he has to go on with his little son without the mother. Well done!
The untimely or sudden death of someone we loved the most is really painful, dreadful, and unacceptable. Daniel, your story about love and loss is well crafted. Well done.