She walked along the hedgerows placing flowers in her basket—poppies, cornflowers, orchids and foliage. She trudged three miles into town with desperation in her heart. 

“Buy some flowers for your pretty lady, mister?” She was rudely pushed aside. She wandered Main Street all day. Despondent, legs aching and flowers wilting. 

Eventually she sat and wept, until a gentle hand rested on her shoulder. She looked up into the face of a hero.

“Please sir, me ma is dying. She needs a physic or me and Tommy will end up in the workhouse.”

“I’m a doctor. I’ll help,” he said.

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    Voice-Team
    Voice-Team(@voice-team)
    Admin
    Reply to  Carrie OLeary
    3 months ago

    Hi Carrie – We don’t think you need a comma after “Eventually”, and this new punctuation checking software agrees: https://quillbot.com/punctuation-checker According to this punctuation checker, which we have tested and approved, your sentence is equally correct with or without the comma. In addition to discovering this new software to help writers, we have also added a new section in the Writing Submission Status article which specifically addresses the use of commas: https://voice.club/help/45952/writing-submission-entry-status… Read more »

    Margarida Brei
    Margarida Brei(@margarida-brei)
    3 months ago

    What a sweet young girl with far too much of a burden to carry at such a young age!

    Lotchie Carmelo
    Lotchie Carmelo(@lotchie-carmelo)
    3 months ago

    Such a very bittersweet piece of a young lovely lady who is carrying too much burden in life. I am glad that someone offered to help. That’s uplifting. Very well done

    Lotchie Carmelo
    Lotchie Carmelo(@lotchie-carmelo)
    Reply to  Carrie OLeary
    3 months ago

    The doctor is a good Samaritan. Yes. He is sent from above. I hope the mum, the little girl, and the brother Tommy are now good and safe.

    Linda Rock
    Linda Rock(@linda-rock)
    3 months ago

    You perfectly captured the desperation and desolation of this young girl, Carrie, so much so that I really felt her pain. And your story took me right back to those Dickensian days but, thankfully, one that ended with a hopeful outcome. Great writing!

    Margarida Brei
    Margarida Brei(@margarida-brei)
    3 months ago

    Just out of curiosity, where did you locate the beautiful picture? The young girl is so wholesome looking.

    Margarida Brei
    Margarida Brei(@margarida-brei)
    Reply to  Carrie OLeary
    3 months ago

    Thanks for the information. Is this a free app?

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